https://www.canva.com/design/DAGh56i7iS8/Gy-w8mAbMrk5fM201EFHpQ/view?embed
Author: Jennifer Benjamin
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Honoring Excellence in Family Therapy – Denise S. Nominated for the 2025 Marion Lindblad-Goldberg Award
MLG Award- Supervisor
The Philadelphia Child and Family Therapy Training Center is proud to announce that Denise Stoneroad has been nominated as a supervisor for the 2025 Marion Lindblad-Goldberg (MLG) Award. Denise’s nomination is a powerful recognition of her unwavering commitment to systemic family therapy, her leadership in guiding clinicians, and her dedication to fostering resilience in families.
With a deep appreciation for systemic perspective, Denise challenges the traditional view of adolescents with “bad” behavior being seen in isolation. Instead, she ensures that her teams assess family interactions as a whole, seeking to understand the root causes of behaviors rather than focusing on a single identified client. During the challenges of the pandemic, she demonstrated exceptional leadership, guiding her team to grow stronger, adapt, and collaborate rather than becoming isolated—just therapists encourage families to do in therapy.
As a supervisor, Denise embodies the balance between professional boundaries and collaboration. She has cultivated a culture where clinicians build their own competence and resilience rather than relying on her to “rescue” them. By reinforcing patience and preparation, she helps clinicians and families develop the confidence to tackle challenges independently.
Denise also engages in social ecology with a keen sense of self-awareness. She encourages her teams to explore their own lived experiences and how those experiences shape their professional growth. A strong proponent of deliberate practice and videotaping, she fosters an environment of continuous learning—both for herself and for those she supervises.
Where others might see chaos as overwhelming, Denise sees opportunity. She remains calm and courageous in the face of crises, guiding her teams to help families make meaningful, lasting changes. Whether supporting caregivers in shifting family dynamics or helping clinicians navigate their own professional challenges, she instills the mindset that struggle is a stepping stone to transformation.
Denise’s ability to assess with complexity while acting with simplicity makes her an invaluable mentor. She helps her teams synthesize large amounts of data, break it down into meaningful insights, and use it to engage families in treatment planning. Through her guidance, clinicians help caregivers see problems in a new light and build stronger, child-centered, caregiver-led plans for family success.
Denise Stoneroad’s nomination is a testament to her extraordinary impact on systemic family therapy. Her leadership, insight, and commitment to second-order change embody the very essence of the MLG Award.
Please join us in celebrating Denise and her remarkable contributions to the field. Stay tuned as we continue to highlight the incredible nominees shaping the future of family therapy!
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Ted Lasso’s Leadership Lessons for Systemic Family Therapists: Part 1 – Foundations of Connection
When working with families, systemic therapists know that the foundation of change isn’t built on interventions alone—it’s built on relationships, trust, and belief in the family’s ability to grow. Ted Lasso, with his unshakable optimism and human-centered leadership, provides the perfect framework for approaching therapy with warmth, curiosity, and connection. In this first installment of our Ted Lasso Leadership Lessons for Systemic Family Therapists series, we explore three core principles that set the stage for effective therapy: Be Curious, Not Judgmental; Believe in Your People; and Build Relationships First.
1. Be Curious, Not Judgmental
One of Ted’s most memorable quotes comes from an impromptu game of darts: “Be curious, not judgmental.” This mindset is critical in family therapy. When families enter the therapy room, they often expect to be judged—by society, by professionals, even by each other. Our job as systemic therapists is to replace judgment with genuine curiosity.
🔹 Instead of assuming why a caregiver reacts a certain way, ask about their experience.
🔹 Rather than labeling a child as “oppositional,” explore the relational function of their behavior within the family system.
🔹 Shift from seeing a family’s struggles as resistance to seeing them as adaptations to their environment.Curiosity opens doors to deeper understanding, allowing us to join with families instead of positioning ourselves as distant experts. It also models a relational stance that caregivers can adopt in their interactions with their children.
2. Believe in Your People
One of Ted Lasso’s defining qualities is his unwavering belief in his team—even when they don’t believe in themselves. Families coming into therapy often feel defeated and stuck, weighed down by patterns they can’t seem to break. Therapists must hold the hope for them, even when they’ve lost sight of it themselves.
🔹 Instead of focusing solely on deficits, highlight family strengths—even the small ones.
🔹 Normalize the difficulty of change while reinforcing that progress is possible.
🔹 When a caregiver expresses doubt, remind them of moments when they successfully supported their child.
Believing in families doesn’t mean ignoring their struggles—it means seeing their potential for growth and resilience, even when they can’t see it themselves.
3. Build Relationships First
Ted Lasso doesn’t walk into a locker room and immediately start coaching strategy—he builds relationships first. Systemic therapists must do the same. Techniques and interventions are important, but without a strong therapeutic alliance, they fall flat. Families need to feel safe, heard, and valued before they’re willing to engage in change.
🔹 Take the time to join with each family member and understand their perspective.
🔹 Use humor, warmth, and presence to create an environment where families feel comfortable.
🔹 Be mindful of power dynamics and subsystems, ensuring that all voices—especially those who feel unheard—have space in the room.Therapy is a collaborative process, and when families feel a connection with their therapist, they are more willing to take the risks necessary for change.
Conclusion: Laying the Groundwork for Change
Systemic therapy is about creating an environment where transformation is possible—and that starts with how we show up. When we approach families with curiosity instead of judgment, believe in their ability to grow, and prioritize relationships over interventions, we lay the foundation for meaningful change.
Stay tuned for the next installment in our series, where we explore how optimism, vulnerability, and small actions shape the therapeutic process. Until then, remember: Believe!
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When the Caregiver Is Hopeless, They Need a Reframe!
As systemic family therapists, we often meet caregivers who feel exhausted, overwhelmed, and hopeless. They’ve tried everything, yet nothing seems to change. The child’s behaviors persist, stress mounts, and they begin to believe that their situation is unfixable. This is where reframing becomes one of the most powerful tools we have.
Why Do Caregivers Lose Hope?
Caregivers become hopeless when they no longer believe in their ability to make a difference in their child’s life. This can happen for many reasons:
- They’ve tried multiple strategies without success.
- They feel blamed or judged by professionals.
- They are emotionally drained from ongoing struggles.
- They see their child’s behaviors as permanent and unchangeable.
When a caregiver loses hope, their ability to be an effective leader in the family weakens, making it even harder for change to happen. This is why reframing is essential—it shifts their perspective and helps them see a path forward.
The Power of Reframing
Reframing isn’t about ignoring a caregiver’s struggles or dismissing their pain. It’s about helping them see things differently so they can regain a sense of agency, purpose, and confidence.
Example 1
Caregiver: “They cut themselves again!”
Therapist: “This is a high stakes situation…it makes sense you are scared you don’t want to lose your child to depression…you know what it takes to overcome depression…I can’t help but wonder how you did that…can you tell me about that…”
Example 2
Caregiver: “They have to go to the hospital they want to die.”
Therapist: “Oh my…your child believes they have burdened you and killing themselves is the only option they have…It is tragic how they aren’t experiencing the love you have for them…”
Example 3
Caregiver: “The kid is the problem…not me”
Therapist: “Can I tell you where I think we need your leadership? The unwanted guest of addiction has everyone bound to secrecy…Can you help me take stand against the addiction haunting this family?!”
Reframing Is Isomorphic
The way we reframe for caregivers is isomorphic to what we want them to do for their child. Just as caregivers need to see their efforts in a new light, children need caregivers who can see beyond their behaviors and recognize their underlying needs.
Final Thoughts
When caregivers feel hopeless, they don’t need more strategies or interventions, they need a shift in perspective that restores their confidence. As therapists, our job is to help them see their strength, their efforts, and their ability to create change—because once a caregiver believes in themselves again, hope returns, and change becomes possible.
💡 Want to learn more about using reframing in systemic family therapy? Stay connected with our blog for insights, training opportunities, and expert guidance!
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How Do You Show Up to Supervision?
Supervision is a crucial part of professional development in systemic family therapy. It’s more than just a place to discuss cases; it’s a space for reflection, growth, and transformation. How you show up—both mentally and emotionally—can shape the experience and impact your clinical work.
What to Do:
✅ Come Prepared – Review your cases beforehand. Identify specific challenges, themes, or questions to discuss. Supervisors appreciate when you take ownership of your learning by bringing relevant material to the conversation.
✅ Be Open to Feedback – Supervision is an opportunity to learn, not to prove yourself. Approach it with a growth mindset. Acknowledge areas where you need support and be receptive to constructive criticism.
✅ Engage in Self-Reflection – Systemic family therapy requires an awareness of your own patterns and biases. Use supervision to explore how your personal experiences may be influencing your work with families.
✅ Participate Actively – Don’t just passively receive feedback—ask questions, challenge ideas, and explore different perspectives. Engaged participation leads to richer discussions and deeper learning.
✅ Integrate Theory and Practice – Link your clinical work to systemic principles. Discuss how concepts like boundaries, hierarchy, and enactments show up in your sessions and how you are applying them in real time.
What Not to Do:
🚫 Arrive Unprepared – Coming to supervision without specific cases or questions limits the potential for meaningful discussion. Supervision is most effective when you contribute actively.
🚫 Be Defensive – If you resist feedback or justify every decision, you close yourself off from growth. Instead, embrace supervision as a place to challenge your thinking and refine your approach.
🚫 View It as a Formality – Supervision is not a box to check; it’s an integral part of becoming a stronger therapist. Show up engaged and ready to learn.
🚫 Ignore Your Own Emotional Responses – Your reactions to families offer valuable insight. If you dismiss or suppress them, you miss an opportunity to deepen your self-awareness and clinical intuition.
Final Thoughts:
How you show up to supervision matters. When you engage with curiosity, openness, and intentionality, you maximize your growth as a systemic family therapist. Supervision is a powerful space—use it wisely!
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Super Bowl….Systemic Family Therapy
The Super Bowl is more than just a football game—it’s a cultural event that brings people together, sparks emotions, and showcases teamwork at its finest. If we take a step back and look at the game through a systemic lens, we can see how football and family therapy have more in common than we might think. Like a great football team, families function best when they have strong leadership, clear communication, and the ability to adapt to challenges.
Strong Leadership Matters
Just like a football team needs a strong coach to provide guidance and direction, families rely on caregivers to create structure and provide leadership. In systemic family therapy, we focus on the role of parental leadership in setting boundaries, fostering emotional security, and ensuring each family member feels supported. Without clear leadership, both football teams and families struggle to stay aligned and work toward common goals.
Effective Communication Prevents Fumbles
On the field, players must communicate effectively to execute plays and avoid costly mistakes. In families, communication is just as critical. Systemic family therapy highlights how patterns of miscommunication can lead to frustration, misunderstandings, and conflict. By improving how family members listen, express their needs, and respond to each other, they can function more like a well-coordinated team rather than a group of individuals working against each other.
Trust and Support Make a Difference
Winning teams build trust between players, knowing that each person has a role to play. Families thrive when members feel safe, valued, and supported in their roles. In systemic therapy, we help families recognize and reinforce these connections so that each member knows they are a valuable part of the system.
Flexibility and Adaptability Are Key
A team that refuses to adjust its game plan won’t win many championships. Similarly, families that struggle with rigid expectations and resistance to change often experience more stress and conflict. Systemic therapy helps families develop the flexibility needed to navigate life’s unexpected challenges with resilience and cooperation.
So, as you watch the Super Bowl this year, think about your own family system. Is your “team” functioning at its best? If not, small shifts in leadership, communication, trust, and adaptability can make all the difference.
#SuperBowl #FamilyTherapy #SystemicThinking #Teamwork #StrongerTogether